Day 8 – Back Alleys and Splinters

We checked the time this morning and it was nearly 9.30! We no idea how we managed such a lie-in, but it was great. Straight to the pool again where most of the day was spent between tanning, swimming and trying to keep Alexander from drinking the pool water.

After a break for lunch back at the apartment, it was back to the pool for more sunshine. Amy and I went for drinks and picked up a sleepy Alexander along the way. He munched through some strawberries — including a few soaked in sangria. He wasn’t convinced.

We returned to find the rest of the family in full happy hour mode. This time, it was Alison’s turn to suffer a brain freeze. She declared that frozen cocktails should come with a public health warning — “So cold, it’s not even funny.”

Back at the apartment, Alexander spent some time practicing his leg-spin bowling before we all got an Uber to the marina for dinner. Handy thing about Portugal: kids are allowed to travel in taxis and public transport without a car seat.

Dinner was at Tai Tai, a proper Chinese place. Amy gave Alexander a chopstick to play with, which also gave her a splinter in the thumb. Cue my moment: stepping up as a budget Dr. Derek Shepherd, I sucked it out like a champ. No Grey’s Anatomy soundtrack, but still very heroic.

They brought a starter that wasn’t ours, but Marshall and Amy had already eaten half of it before realising. Safe to say someone was short a portion of beef skewers later.

At one point, a sizzling dish came out to the table next to us — you know, the kind that arrives with flames and drama — but the smoke and chilli fumes set the entire restaurant off into a coughing fit. Literally everyone. Lovely touch.

No free shots or desserts here though — instead, we were handed a full bottle of wine on the way out. Fair enough.

We did a bit of shopping along the marina to pick up some gifts, but of course Alexander picked this moment to produce a top-tier poo. Needing to act fast, we darted into the nearest bar, The Masters Bar, filled with golf memorabilia and proper golfing blokes.

Anna and I asked where the toilets were, and the barman said, “Follow me.” We did. Straight down a dimly lit alleyway led by a silent security guard, past strip clubs and what definitely looked like a drug shop, to a bathroom situation that even my perfect writing would find hard to describe.

No changing table, of course. We improvised: Alexander stood on the sink, watched himself in the mirror, and mid-change, peed all over himself, the sink, and everything in between. A proud parenting moment as we dodged the pee, which could either have been Alexander’s or from the people using the toilets before us. A few pounds lighter, he emerged singing, drumming with straws and delighting passersby.

Our Uber was on its way. While waiting, I gave out to Amy for only giving 3 stars to our earlier driver — she said it was because he didn’t help with the pram. I thought that was a bit harsh, and of course this next driver was lovely, got out to help, and was basically an Uber angel.

The rest of the gang headed to Jakks, and I took Alexander home to bed. Marshall returned shortly after to relieve me so I could head out for one last drink and say goodbye to the Ward families. The bar was closing, so we all made our way home.

To wrap up the night, Amy, Anna and I had a few balcony drinks until Marshall popped his head out the window from upstairs and gave us the full “bedtime now” dad voice. We got the message.

Lights out on another brilliant day.